Raghu has always been a very dedicated employee of his organization and has recently been promoted to a leadership position. He’s quite excited about giving his best as a team leader. He searched online for books that would help him become a better leader and started reading the book “How To Win Friends and Influence People” by Dale Carnegie. He started to have regular conversations with his team members and became a more approachable person. He was quite happy with the way everything’s going on … till he got his team’s monthly performance report and it was the lowest performance in the whole company. It was such a shocking and frustrating experience for Raghu!
Such situations happen to many of us. Right when we think that everything is going on well, something quite unexpected can happen! So how do we approach such situations?! That’s exactly what we are going to look at in this blog! We are going to learn a very interesting Martial Arts principle – which is not only relevant in physical combat but also in all the different kinds of life situations!
“When you’re pushed, pull. When you’re pulled, push.”
A very important principle, especially in martial arts such as Aikido, which might seem counterintuitive for many is “When you’re pushed, pull. When you’re pulled, push.” This enables one to use the opponent’s strength and efforts to his advantage. The same happens when we use the principle in our life! All those situations which you are trying to “fight”, once you get into a state of non-resistance, will start becoming your allies!
Does it mean to say that you just become passive and put no efforts to make your life better ?! NO! On the contrary – this principle actually enables you to give your best in every situation. Are you at your best when you are stuck with something that happened (or happening), feeling low and pissed off? Or when you accept the situation the way it is and see what you can do best for the situation? We are talking not about being a doormat but being able to learn and grow out of situations and to become a solution-oriented person! Understanding this is a key to congruence.
Instead of remaining frustrated about what happened, Raghu decided to rather focus on what he can learn from the situation and to continue his journey of becoming a better leader. He soon began to understand that – leading a team is quite different from doing individual tasks. While he was previously doing his individual tasks – it was mostly under his control, but now making a team function effectively depends on various factors. What are the harmony levels in the team? Are the team members clear about the outcome they need to achieve? Are they making use of the tools and best practices suggested by the organization? … he began to understand that there are many such aspects that he has to focus on as a leader. He also began to consult his superiors for better guidance on how to effectively lead the team and began to apply them, and soon his team’s productivity began to rise!
Applying this Principle to your Leadership :
Become aware of when you are unable to smoothly go through situations, such as :
Are you getting offended when a team member is doing something which you suggested not to do?
Are you taking it personally when someone criticizes you or offers you feedback?
Are you feeling demotivated when your team’s outcome is not up to the mark?
Whenever you are getting into such unresourceful states, shift your focus towards what you can learn from the situation and how you can empathize with and nurture your team members. When you’re pushed, pull. When you’re pulled, push. When you begin to do this, every situation turns into an opportunity to grow and contribute.